Did you catch my latest Facebook Live?? I have been thinking a lot about how off track I got in 2017 with my health, and why it took me until January 2018 to get my crap together. I’d love for you to check out this piece of my story and let me know what you think!
During the course of this 13-week program that I’ve been doing, I’ve had so many people tell me the exact same thing I told myself before I started day 1: “There’s NO WAY I could do that!”
You guys, we have to stop telling ourselves that. YOU CAN DO HARD THINGS. Maybe you have no desire to do something–that’s fine. Maybe you’re ready for it. That’s totally cool. But to tell yourself that you are UNABLE? Nope. We need to quit that.
When you tell yourself that you “can’t” do something, you’re giving up before you’ve even begun. And even if you do start to make some action towards change or progress, you’ll eventually quit or self-sabotage–because you’re telling yourself that you’ll fail. Whatever we tell ourselves in our minds tends to become our reality–so when you tell yourself that you’re not good enough, or you’re not strong enough, or not whatever enough, that is what you truly believe, and your actions will reflect that.
When I started this 13-weeks of commitment to my health, I had to own up to the fact that when I said, “I can’t do this,” it was about being afraid to fail. I had to tell myself that I can do ANYTHING and that I am capable of amazing results. I literally wrote that on my bathroom mirror so I see it every day. I have spent a lot of time during this program changing the way I talk to myself–and look at where I am right now. I’m sticking to the program! It’s not easy, and it takes work, but I AM CAPABLE. If I had kept telling myself that I couldn’t do it, I would have quit a long time ago. I’m so thankful that didn’t happen!
I’ve had a lot of different times when my clients will tell me that my programs just don’t work for them–and that’s totally fine, because not everything works for everyone. But most of the time, when someone tells me it’s not working, I can trace it all back to their mindset at the very beginning and what they were telling themselves.
So many of us give up before we even start with the negative dialogue we have inside our own heads. The world is already negative enough–we don’t need to add to it with our own negativity toward ourselves. And even more than that, we need to practice building each other up as we work on building ourselves up.
Starting today, right this second, when you find yourself telling yourself those lies that you can’t or you’re not good enough or whatever else you tell yourself–STOP. Stop in your tracks, remind yourself that you are strong and capable of amazing things, and just keep going. Because you ARE capable of amazing things.
I cannot say enough how much I am LOVING this program!
I was so intimidated and scared to death before it started, but the longer we get into the process, the more I am loving it. The workouts are tough, sure, but I am DOING THEM! I am feeling stronger literally week by week, and sometimes day by day. I am pushing myself more than I ever have before, and I’m being successful, which I honestly didn’t believe could happen. I am sticking to the nutrition plan better and longer than I have EVER stuck to a plan before–I’m on day 57 of the nutrition and going strong!
For some reason that I really can’t explain, this program has been the easiest for me to stick to, even though it’s longer and more intense than anything I’ve ever done before. It’s not EASY to stick to at all–I have cravings, and I have days where I really don’t want to work out. But it has been easIER than past programs I’ve done. I’ve been trying to figure out why that is, but haven’t been able to come up with a clear answer. Maybe it’s the fact that I committed to a test group, meaning I committed to my company that I would follow the program exactly, instead of just doing it on my own. Maybe it’s because I’m using the preworkout, so once I drink that, it’s accountability to actually do the workout–I’m not wasting that good stuff! Maybe it’s because the nutrition plan is so structured and spelled out for me–it takes a lot of guesswork out for me and makes it simpler for me to make my meal plan for the week. Maybe it’s because this is the first time I’ve consistently meal planned for more than 3 weeks in a row. Maybe it’s because I’m actually doing meal prep on Sundays instead of trying to fix every meal every day. Maybe it was because I was in the right place mentally to make a change. I honestly don’t know, but whatever it is, this program brought it out in me and I love it!
This second phase of the program was a “build” phase, so it’s not really designed to give big results as far as weight loss and fat loss. These workouts were designed to build lean muscle and burn fat, but with more of an emphasis on building the lean muscle. I still lost weight and inches, and am wearing a smaller size of jeans now, so I still got some awesome results, but definitely not as big of a drop as Phase 1. Phase 3 is designed to be the shred phase, really focusing on fat loss, so I’m pretty pumped to see my results at the end!
The nutrition for Phase 2 was pretty identical to Phase 1, but added something totally new to my nutrition routine called Refeed Days. Basically, Refeed Day is a day where I eat more fruit and more carbs than normal, and my carbs are refined flours to up my sugar levels to help my muscles recover better and faster. I’m still eating my lean protein and veggies and I’m still following my plan, so it’s definitely NOT a free-for-all cheat day that I am normally accustomed to. And that is fine with me! I got to eat white flour waffles, some amazing cookies, and a whole banana in my shake–it was the best day.
I was actually kind of scared of Refeed Day–because my past experience is with cheat days where I stuff my face, I was afraid of having cravings and having the Refeed Day turn into a Refeed Week, and derail me and my progress. But that didn’t happen!!! Know why? BECAUSE I FOLLOWED THE PLAN. I ate the approved Refeed foods and nothing else, and I went back to the regular meal plan the next day. It’s pretty simple, y’all. If you have a good plan and you actually follow it, it’s amazing what can happen!
I did get a little tired by the end of Refeed because of the extra sugar, but overall I felt GREAT. I didn’t feel sick to my stomach, I didn’t have acid reflux like I was afraid of, and I felt great the next day too! It really did up my energy and help me push more in my workout the next day, which was the whole point. I get a Refeed Day every other week until the end of the program now, which is very exciting! It’s nice to have a little bit of a mental break from focusing on eating what will fuel my body, to feel like I’m cheating just a little, but to still know that I’m 100% on track!
Overall, I am thrilled with Phase 2. Not just with my Phase 2 results, but with my energy, my confidence, and the boost this entire program has given to my mindset. I had completely lost that mindset that healthy living is a LIFESTYLE and had fallen into that trap of doing short-term plans, seeing some good results, and then going right back to my old habits. It was a constant struggle and I struggled a lot with feeling like a failure. NO MORE. No freaking more! I’m done with starting over–I’ve done it more than once, and I’m not planning on doing it again. This program has done that for me and I’m so grateful–and it’s not even over yet!
I just started my newest accountability group–are you ready to make your transformation a reality? Comment here or click “contact me” at the top of the page to get details on how to join the community!
One of my favorite parts of the new fitness program I’m doing is the focus on self-care. As a mom–no matter how many kids you have, what kind of job you work, or your life situation–taking care of YOU falls to the very bottom of the to-do list. We take care of everyone and everything else before ourselves–and then we are so exhausted that we just don’t think about it.
One thing I’ve learned over the past almost-3 years of focusing on my health and fitness is that when I prioritize taking care of myself, I do a better job taking care of my family, my responsibilities, and just dealing with the stress of life in general. I don’t feel guilty for taking some time for me anymore–it has been tough to deal with that “mom guilt”, but I know the benefit my family gets when I take care of myself, and I don’t feel bad about taking the time I need to be able to benefit them.
So mommas, take a few minutes to take care of YOU. I know, I know–you’re busy, the kids constantly need you, maybe your husband isn’t supportive of time for yourself (which is a whole other conversation!)–but that doesn’t mean that you can’t take care of yourself and fill your cup.
A lot of times we think of self-care as something really expensive or time consuming, like an hour massage, a spa day, or that kind of thing. It doesn’t have to be that complicated, you guys. Here are some of my favorite, cheap, and simple ways to engage in self-care for myself, categorized by the amount of time it takes for your convenience. No matter how busy you are, you can choose something–just ONE thing!–on this list to take care of you. You are worth it, mommas!!! Don’t pour into everyone else from an empty cup.
Self-Care Options for Busy Moms
- 5 deep breaths to clear your mind and de-stress/lessen anxiety
- 3 minute guided meditation from an app like Headspace
- Changing into your favorite sweats or pjs
- Laying in the quiet with your eyes closed for 5 minutes (or sitting in the bathroom–been there, done that)
- Listening to your favorite song
- Scrolling through social media to empty your head and de-stress
- Doing one minute of jumping jacks
- Doing some stretches
- Turning off your alarm and waking up with your kids or just whenever your body wakes you up!
- Using a face mask
- Putting scented lotion on your hands and feet
- A longer guided meditation from an app like Headspace
- Making a list of 5 things you are grateful for in your life
- Calling someone to tell them you love them
- Coloring a picture–either from your kid’s coloring books or an adult coloring book (I swear, this is so relaxing and I don’t know why!)
- Watching an episode of The Office/New Girl/anything that makes you laugh on Netflix
- Painting your nails
- Reading a favorite magazine
- Reading a chapter of a book you love
- A hot shower and a deep conditioner
- Doing some light yoga and/or foam rolling to help sore muscles
- Going for a walk around your neighborhood in the sunshine
- A warm bath (with epsom salt for soreness!)
- Walking around Target or whatever store you like by yourself
- Driving out to get your favorite coffee or tea (preferably alone)
- Listening to some of your favorite podcast
- Taking a power nap
- Getting a great workout in (you really can do this in 20-30 minutes if you work out at home! Ask me how 😉 )
- Getting your nails done at the salon
- Getting your hair cut and styled
- A massage
- An afternoon alone!
- Watching a movie
- Taking a long nap
- Girl’s night out/girl’s dinner
- Date night with your partner!
When you’re new to engaging in self-care, it can feel weird, overwhelming, or even selfish at first. Start with something simple and quick, and work your way up to the longer ones. I do one of the quick options every single day, and do longer options far less frequently–but we all have to start somewhere, so just START!
What are your favorite ways to fill your cup back up? Share your favorite self-care tips in the comments!
Personal development was not something I was familiar with before I started my business. It kind of sounded hokey to me at first–I’ve always been very wary of anything that sounds like “self-help”. When I found out that personal development was one of the vital behaviors that my company encourages for being successful, I knew I had to at least give it a try. And I’m so glad I did!
Personal development has helped me in so many ways; it’s helped me better live out the Scripture that talks about only thinking on those things that are lovely and true (aka positive and worthy), it’s helped me with my confidence, it’s helped me with my discipline, and it’s helped me shift my perspective from depressed and negative to more positive and optimistic. All of those changes within me have positively affected every other area of my life, especially my relationships with my husband and son! I’ve learned that by working on ME, I become better in every area of life and EVERYONE around me benefits from that!
I’ve read a lot of books over the past few years dedicated to working on ME, so I wanted to share some of my favorite ones and categorize them–that way, you just look for a category that fits the area of improvement you want to focus on for yourself, and there is at least one suggestion to get you started.
Do you already read personal development? I’d love to hear your recommendations, too! Share them with me in the comments!
Fear of Failure/Fear of Getting Started
Start by Jon Acuff
Go for No by Richard Fenton and Andrea Waltz
Make It Happen by Lara Casey
Failing Forward by John C Maxwell
Take the Stairs by Rory Vaden
The Slight Edge by Jeff Olson
The Compound Effect by Darren Hardy
The Miracle Morning by Hal Elrod
The Miracle Morning for Network Marketers by Hal Elrod
The 5-Second Rule by Mel Robbins
Made to Crave by Lysa Terkeurst
Get Over Your Damn Self by Romi Neustadt
You Are a Badass by Jen Sincero
Start by Jon Acuff
The 15 Invaluable Laws of Growth by John C Maxwell
The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership by John C Maxwell
Pretty Happy by Kate Hudson
The Me-Tox by Beth Behrs
Superlife by Darin Olien (my ultimate favorite choice!)
Superlife by Darin Olien
Everyday Paleo by Sarah Fragoso
It Starts With Food by Dallas Hartwig and Melissa Hartwig
Fear of Rejection
Go For No! by Richard Fenton and Andrea Waltz
The Energy Bus by Jon Gordon
Start by Jon Acuff
The Slight Edge by Jeff Olson
Eat That Frog! by Brian Tracy
Crush It! by Gary Vaynerchuk
The Go Getter by Peter B. Kyne
10x Rule by Grant Cardone
Go Pro by Eric Worre
Get Over Your Damn Self by Romi Neustadt
Jab, Jab, Jab Right Hook by Gary Vaynerchuk
Happy February, friends!
We are well into 2018 and I have big goals for this year–for myself, my family, and my business! 2017 was a little bit of a dumpster fire for me at times, but the end of the year brought me some really great improvements from #mySADexperiment and it’s been great to keep that going!
By focusing very intentionally on my nutrition and my fitness (plus continuing the medication my doctor prescribed me last spring, of course), I have been able to manage my depression and anxiety SO MUCH BETTER than last winter. I have been feeling more confident and more even-keeled, and not dealing with some of my usual issues like bloating, indigestion, and poor sleep.
I knew I wanted to keep up my progress with this going into 2018, so I committed to something I have NEVER done before–and honestly it kind of freaked me out. A brand new fitness program launched in January, and at first I really wasn’t sure if I wanted in or not. First of all, it’s longer than any other program I’ve done before: 90 days total with 80 workouts. That’s a lot!!! Second, the workouts themselves are longer than I’m used to, ranging between 35 min and 60 min, where I usually stick to 30 minutes. I was pretty content to let this program go by without getting involved; it was way out of my comfort zone and I honestly didn’t think I could do it. I didn’t believe in myself or my ability to do hard things.
As soon as I saw the before and after pictures from the test group, however, I was in. Like, got super excited and ready for a challenge, ALL IN. I committed not only to doing the program, but doing it full out, exactly as written. That means following the meal plan for the entire time, doing all of the workouts, not skipping a day, not talking myself into a sweet tea during week 2, not having some birthday cake for my kiddo’s birthday. ALL IN.
Plus, this program was created by my absolute favorite trainer, Autumn, so that made it easier to say yes to it. My biggest motivation for doing this, besides continuing my progress from #mySADexperiment, is the trip to Mexico I’m taking in April with my hubby. I earned an invitation to this trip, and will be there with other health and fitness coaches–and I’m really excited!! But I also know that I don’t want to spend my time there around a bunch of other really fit women and compare myself–all that will do is make me feel bad about myself, and that’s goofy. Doing this program, regardless of my outcome, will help me build confidence and feel awesome, and I know that will help my confidence on the beach in April, too.
I’ll be sharing my progress after I finish Phase 1 (out of three) next week, and I’ll also give some more info about the nutrition plan for this program–because it’s different than what I’ve done in the past and I am loving it!
Here are my starting pictures. I don’t have specific goals as far as weight or inches lost by the end, because I really want to focus on just doing the process as written and see what happens. I’m excited for the journey! If you need some badass results in your life, too, contact me! Let’s chat and get you in to my next group!
Self-discipline is hard. Whether you’re talking about food choices, fitness, getting up with my alarm, having more patience with my three year old, or whatever else I’ve got going on in my life, being disciplined is a constant battle. I’m always looking for an easier way out, or just reacting to situations instead of thinking through the best choice–I’m sure you can relate. It’s hard to be a disciplined person, and I fall short pretty much every day.
It’s been a few years since I started focusing on being more disciplined, and it’s pretty amazing how far I’ve come in so many areas of my life–but there is always more room to grow! I’ve been reading (for a second time, actually) an amazing book and just wanted to recommend it to you.
Take the Stairs by Rory Vaden is exactly what I need to read right now–he is all about learning to be disciplined in every area of life, and that has been a great lesson for me over the last few years. I can choose a specific area of my life to grow in my discipline–focusing solely on workouts, or just on my patience, for example–but to truly grow in discipline, it needs to be something that pervades all areas of my life. I need to learn to become a disciplined WOMAN in general, not just a disciplined eater or a disciplined exerciser. I love that idea, and it’s exactly the type of person I want to become. If this is something you struggle with, too, please do yourself a favor and add this book to your Christmas list.
Also, a bit of encouragement: one of the most difficult aspects of learning to be disciplined (for me, anyway) was feeling like I had to muster up the strength to be more disciplined. It was overwhelming and exhausting for me to think about trying my hardest every day to be more disciplined! It made me not even want to try, because who can do that all day every day? Not me, for sure. But then I came across this verse that comforted me and made me feel really empowered:
“For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love, and self-discipline.” 2 Timothy 1:7
If you are a Christian, you already have a Spirit of self-discipline within you–you just have to ask God to help you live that out and choose to submit to that Spirit in your day to day choices. So be encouraged by that!
What books have you read that have helped you with this idea of self-discipline? I’d love to hear about it in the comments!